How to Stop Letting Real Estate Run Your Life

Garrett Maroon:
Real estate agents, stop letting real estate run your life. I get it, guys, I'm an agent too. I have been for 11 years and I understand that we all fall into this same trap. The industry lie that success only equals more closings, longer hours, constant hustle.

And I get it, these common frustrations that we all feel—missing family time, we're never truly off, right? We're always chasing the next deal.

If I see one more agent on vacation posting about them writing an offer sitting on the beach, being proud of themselves, I don't know what's gonna happen, but it's not gonna be good.

Here's the reality: we fall into this trap. What does your family want? They don't want you to be out there hustling more. They want you to be present right where you are.

At the end of your life, it's not gonna say how many deals you did on your headstone, what your GCI was, what your volume was. It's hopefully gonna say follower of Jesus, loving husband, loving wife, great dad, great mom, great grandparent, great grandmother, or whatever.

Look, I understand you're not lazy or broken. It's the system that you've been handed. It's unsustainable.

When I say what does success mean to you, when I ask any average real estate agent what is success, they're gonna say, "Well, they sell a lot of homes, they make a lot of money," right? Maybe they drive a nice car, whatever it is. But that's a lie.

Now, maybe that's true, but I remember an agent in my market—I'm not gonna say the name—but I remember an agent in my market who was getting awarded the number one agent at Realtor Prom. People coming up, cheering for him, taking selfies with him, posting about how great of a year he had. But it was well known that not only was he the number one agent that year, he had lost his marriage. He was no longer talking to one of his kids.

So maybe he won the award and he was selling all the homes, but he was going home to an empty house. Is that success?

Step 1: Recognize the Problem

So how do we stop letting real estate run our lives?
Number one, we've just got to realize there's a problem with the definition of success—not just for us as believers, but for the industry as a whole.

Number two, we need to reframe success. We need to define what do we actually want.

So how do we stop letting real estate run our lives? We've got to actually know what we're aiming for. So we don't just fall prey to whatever it is that they tell us to go for.

What's the point of building a business if it costs you your life outside of it? That doesn't make sense.

We've got to step back. We've got to clarify values. We've got to look and say, "What is it that the Lord desires for me?"

Maybe you're that stay-at-home mom who homeschools her kids and also sells five to ten homes on the side because that's what you have time for. And even though the industry keeps telling you, "You could do more, you need to go sell more homes," you step back and say, "Okay, hold on. Let me talk to the Lord. Let me talk to my husband. Let's figure out what makes sense for me."

And when you say, "It's five homes because that's what I can do while I keep my feet right where I want them to be—homeschooling the kids, at home with them, serving in my church," whatever the scenario is, you seek to find joy and contentment right there.

The problem is—whatever your scenario may be—you're the husband who is working so many hours and you keep saying, "I'm doing this for my family." But what does your family want?

They don't want the extra lake house. They don't need the bigger, nicer car. They need daddy at home.

Step 2: Reframe Success

Figure out why am I doing this. You all have heard my story when I created this idea of the scoreboard, right?

How do I actually keep score for myself? Well, I had a team, we were doing really well. I had figured out a way to double my income, but the only problem was it was going to cost me an extra 20 hours a week.

We had three kids at the time—now we have five—and I remember thinking right then in that moment, looking back on the man five years from now, if I could look back on you right here in this moment (that was in 2022), who would you be most proud of? The guy who spent more time at work, less time at home, but doubled his income? Or the man that figured out a way to work less, make the same amount of income, and be home and present with his family?

I remember the moment a couple years before that where I was working, I was working a ton of hours—just building, trying to get there as fast as I could—and I remember this moment where I finally came to my wife, Rachel, and I said, "Hold on, I don't know why I've never asked you this before, but babe, if it takes me longer to build what I'm trying to build, but I get to be home more often—is that what you want? Or do you want me to go full speed ahead and build that?"

She said, "I want you to be home more often."

And I thought to myself, why am I not asking these questions? Business isn't a me thing, it's an us thing.

So husband, if you're out there hustling your butt off but you haven't had a conversation with your wife if that's what she wants, mom, if you're out there hustling but you haven't had a conversation with your husband who's gonna say, "I didn't realize you were gonna be gone this much"—we need to have these kinds of conversations.

Even if you're a young solo agent and you're single or dating and you're in this position where you're like, "Well, it's just me, I might as well go out and hustle," you still need people around you to say, "Please hold me accountable."

Unbridled ambition can still lead you into very bad, dangerous places.

Step 3: Keep Score a Different Way

We need to keep score in a different way.

As believers, we've got to keep score a different way because the most important relationship in your life is with the Lord, and then it's with your spouse if you're married, and then it's with your kids.

If you're a grandparent, it's the Lord, your spouse, your kids, your grandkids.

Maybe you're a pastor and you're selling homes on the side—it's the Lord, your spouse, your kids, the church, then your real estate work.

When I stopped just measuring how many deals, how much money, what my GCI was, what my profit was (those are good things to measure), when I said, "You know what, I'm gonna keep score a different way"—I had a profit goal, sure I did, but I also had a wife goal: two date dates a month; a family goal: take every seventh week off.

I now had a new way to define what actually mattered to me.

Someone invited me to come speak at this really cool event—what would have been a really cool event. It checked off the profit box, I still could have had my dates, but guess what? It fell on the seventh week off.

The answer was, "Guys, I really appreciate you. The answer is no."

I had a new way to keep score.

You have to define what you actually want. Yes, we recognize the industry's definition of success is broken, but if we don't replace that definition, we fall back into that definition. Let's replace it.

Step 4: Build a Better System

Finally, build a better system. I'm gonna give you some practical tools to take back control.

Number one: Time block and protect thinking time. I want you to take 30 minutes a week—that’s it—just 30 minutes. Put it somewhere in your calendar just to stop, pause, think, and reflect.

How am I doing? Am I in pursuit of what my mission is, or am I in pursuit of a different person's mission?

We fall very easily into looking at our neighbor and thinking, “I should probably be doing that too.” If they're selling 100 homes, I guess I should. If they're selling 10, I guess I should. If they're going to that conference, I guess I should.

Take 30 minutes a week. Stop. Pause. “Lord, am I on mission? Am I living out the mission with my business that You've called me to?”

Your mission's not the same as your neighbor’s. Your mission is not the same as your broker’s, your team leader’s, or your agent friends. You have your own mission.

Pay attention to those things. Reset when you need to reset.

Number two: Delegate or automate repeatable tasks.

So, okay—you continue to do this transaction work. Maybe you could hire someone for $400 a deal and buy back all of that time.

Maybe you continually have to create different social media posts and it takes you forever to come up with the concepts. Maybe you work with ChatGPT to help you think through it.

Maybe you're out showing houses all day, every day. That's why you're always going on Saturday, you never come to the soccer game, you're even late to church on Sundays.

You know what? Maybe you need to go find a showing assistant—someone who can open doors for you.

Delegate some of those tasks.

If you're going to protect your life, if you're going to make sure that real estate is not running your life but you are in control of where your feet want to be and are going to be on any given day, you’ve got to build a better system.

Time block. Think about it. Am I on mission?

Delegate or automate repeatable tasks.

Number three: Set boundaries with clients.

You can't serve well being on call 24/7.

When I was early on in my career, I remember how scary it was to sit down with my clients and say, "Here are my hours. I'm available 8 to 7, Monday through Friday. Saturday by appointment. I'm off on Sundays. Now, the only reason I'm gonna engage on Sundays is if we're actively negotiating and you are going to miss out on something because I'm not working—then I'll show up and help you. Otherwise, that's the day for my family. That's the day for the Lord. And Wednesdays are date night. After 5, you're not gonna get a hold of me."

They thought, “Wow, 8 to 7, that’s long hours.” I wasn’t working the whole time, but I was available. At 7 o’clock, my phone shut off. I’d get to it the next day.

Five o’clock on Wednesdays—date night.

I can’t tell you how scared I was at the beginning, but no one ever had a problem with it.

Then I’d get voice messages on Wednesday night from someone saying, “Garrett, I know it’s date night. Please don’t call me back. But let me know in the morning when you get a chance.”

The reality is, I know the industry tells us we have to be open 24/7.

When I started implementing that rule, it wasn’t my clients that had a problem—it was another agent.

I got a voicemail from an agent on a Sunday that I listened to Monday morning. This guy was cussing me out because he said, “You have to be available when we need you. This is real estate. We’re 24/7.”

I called him back, and he said, “Hey, we got our moisture inspection back and needed to get it to you.”

I’m thinking, Bro, this was not urgent. So much so that I should pull off my Sabbath away from my family just for you to tell me that?

You don’t get to dictate what my life looks like. The Lord does. My family does.

You don’t have to be available 24/7.

I’ll give you one more example.

I was competing on a listing with a discount broker—this discount broker was well known in our market and a good agent. I go to the listing appointment, and the next day, I had blocked off what I called “Garrett time.”

This was probably 2017. Garrett time meant I was going to the pool for two hours, shutting off my phone, just relaxing and taking a break.

When I came back, I had multiple missed calls from this potential seller. One of them was a voicemail that said, “Garrett, if you’re not the agent that’s going to answer right when I call, then you’re not the agent for me. Call me back.”

So I called him back, and he said, “How can you not answer? You gotta answer if you’re going to build a business.”

And I said, “Listen, sir, I totally respect what you’re saying, but I just need you to know that I prioritize taking care of my family, myself, and my people. I can’t do all of it at once. I’ve got to be intentional with my time. If you’re looking for an agent who is available to you 24/7, please don’t hire me because that’s not me.”

We hung up.

The next day, he called me and said, “Garrett, I want to go with you.”

Keep in mind, I told him I wouldn’t be available whenever he wanted, and I was charging more.

He said, “Garrett, I realized you really do protect and prioritize what matters, and I appreciate that about you. Will you come help me?”

We sold his home.

Set boundaries with clients, and they will respect you.

If you don’t respect yourself, they won’t respect you.

If you don’t respect your family enough to say, “Guys, six o’clock, I’m at dinner. Six to seven my phone’s off, but if there’s something urgent, text me and I’ll take a look at it.”

If you don’t set the boundary, they’ll take advantage of you.

Set the boundary.

Three Action Steps

Number one: Block off time to think. Thirty minutes. “Am I on mission? Where did I go off mission? How do I protect it next week?”

Number two: Delegate or automate repeatable tasks.

Number three: Set boundaries with clients.

Systems create freedom—they’re not restriction. They create freedom for you.

Put these things in place. Pay attention. Stop to think. Protect your time. Protect your family’s time. Put the phone away.

Ultimately, you can build a business that works for your life, not a business that forces your life to serve it.

Your business is supposed to support your life—not the other way around.

And the hierarchy of attention, my friends: it’s the Lord, it’s your spouse, it’s your kids, and then it’s your work.

That is the right order.

Final Thoughts

I encourage you—go grab my free eBook, The Faithful Agent eBook. Go to faithfulagent.com. It’s going to help you focus on building a business that’s more glorifying and honoring to the Lord and more effective.

It’s 10 chapters, short and easy. Each one has an actionable step. Go grab that.

If you feel like your business and your life are not where you want them to be, and you need more help than that, go to 210collective.com.

Schedule a call with me. I’d love to hear what’s going on and how I can support you. Maybe the 2:10 Collective might be a way to support you as well.

Faithful agents, as you think through these things and pray through these things, figure out a way to stop letting real estate run your life.

Submit to the Lord. Identify the problem—that you want the success the world offers. Step two, reframe what success looks like from a biblical lens. And finally, use better tools and systems to actually go achieve that life.

I love you, Faithful Agents.

I want this business to be a blessing to you and to those around you.

It shouldn’t take from your life—it should give to your life.

And ultimately, it should give glory to the King.

I love you, Faithful Agents. I pray this was a blessing to you. I’ll see you next week.